We're living in prophetic times, says a newly-revealed ancient text inscribed by Egyptian scholars shortly after the Exodus. Having survived the millennia, these texts are now part of The Kolbrin Bible. They offer uncannily accurate predictions, and several have already come to pass.
Those yet to be fulfilled warn us that Muslim terrorists will soon trigger a world war that destroys the United Nations and then divides the world into bloody hegemonies. Following that, another prediction warns of a global cataclysm in which humanity suffers an E. L. E. (extinction level event) with asteroid impacts, massive earthquakes, erupting volcanoes and tsunami waves.